We arrived in Pai a little uncertain on how it would feel to be back on the backpacker trail. Tucked into the mountains of Northern Thailand, Pai is an oasis for hippie travelers to unload for a while, hang out at the innumerable bars, share stories over hilltribe ganja, and shop for puffy pants. It was immediately obvious this wasn’t our scene. Perhaps a few months ago when we were bouncing between city, temple and waterfall in a unending cycle, such a place would have been more than welcome, but today something was missing. It was confirmation of a theory I had been working on, and I was a little sad to be right about it.
We’ve been on the road nearly a year now, and in that time the way we travel has changed just as much as our locations. When exploring this change in ourselves and comparing it to other long term travelers we’ve met along the way, there seems to be a pretty standard pattern that emerges:
Stage 1. At the beginning you are like a kid in a candy store. You hit as many sites as you can fit into the daylight hours and drink as many beers as you can at night. You spend almost all your time with other backpackers, asking a lot of questions and trying to figure out the ropes of backpacking. Generally, you act as if you’re on a short term holiday and try to squeeze as much fun out of your time as possible.
Stage 2. With a few weeks on the road, you think you know it all. Interactions with other backpackers often involve one person spewing unsolicited travel wisdom while everyone else is thinking of how to one up them. You’re still moving fast, but every now and again you take a day or two to chill at the hostel and recharge your batteries.
Stage 3. No longer are you compelled to see every temple in town and activities may be writing a blog post or sitting on the beach reading. You find yourself more interested in talking to the local bartender than that pack of 20-something Brits chain smoking in the corner. You began traveling for the new experiences, but the repetitive cycle of sightseeing and moving from place to place is anything but that. It’s at this stage you may get into short term commitments like learning to scuba dive, yoga/meditation retreats, or language schools.
Stage 4. You no longer feel like you are on a holiday, this is real life now. You start to realize in order understand a place you need to foster relationships with the local people past the customer and client roles in the tourist industry. The best way to do this is to live and, dare I say it, work where you are. Additionally, you may really be jonesing for a change of pace in your life. Meeting strangers, looking at stuff and eating can only be exciting for so long. Some get part time jobs handing out fliers or working at a bar. Others get involved in things like internships in natural building and organic farming. In the end the result is the same, true friendships with local people and a deeper understanding of local culture.
After two months on the farm, we were well into stage 4 when we got to Pai, and it wasn’t the right place to be for that state of mind. To make the best of it we visited another organic farm and had a great time learning about their operation from the eccentric Thai guy that ran the place. In the end I don’t think this evolutionary process is a dead end, it’s up to you to choose your own experience. We had a hard time adjusting to Pai because of the huge contrast in the scene and little difference in environment between it and farm. With the right attitude you can make your experience what ever you want, and if someplace gets played out, move on and start over. That is the beauty of backpacking.
Hi guys! My name’s G, from the site listed above, formerly http://www.fmy401k.com . I linked to you from http://www.travelingtolive.com ‘s blog and I’m glad I found you! Even just reading this entry I think I’ll enjoy your blog quite a lot! It’s funny to have come across this particular one, as we’re in the neighborhood in Chiang Mai experiencing pretty darn close to a similar thing after almost 8 months on the road. I knew the world had undoubtedly gone crazy (or I had) when we finally hit the Thailand beaches…and I was utterly disinterested.
BLASPHEMY!!!
I know I’ll want to go back someday when I’m back in the beach/experiencing/sightseeing/enjoying mode, maybe even on this trip if we can swing it…but for now, yeah things have slowed down quite a lot and we’re quite content to hang out in our hotel room and catch up on our to-do lists and more passively enjoy the things in the area (Sunday night markets, the occasional trip out to pet tigers, take a Thai cooking course from a master, etc.). For now and the next few months, our desire to check out all the different countries on our itinerary for a few weeks at a time each trumps our desire to just be in one place and – I agree, gasp! But it’s true! – want to work, but I totally know what you mean. Long-term travel is truly something else. Maybe it’s more than and less that “we must be getting old”, like we usually chalk it up to being. :]
I look forward to reading more of your stuff. Please feel free to drop me and Ray a line anytime, we’re happy to “meet” you!
I’ve often enjoyed reflecting on the stages of expatriate life and living abroad (like in one place) and found a lot of similarities to what you have discovered. You’re totally right that the attitude and mobility are key to your happiness, and you’re smart to be able to read the situation and adjust those two aspects.
I can’t BELIEVE it’s been a year, as it seems that it was just yesterday that we were throwing you going-away parties. But of course so much has happened, here and there both. Three cheers for personal discovery journeys, whether at home or abroad!
XOXOXOXOXOXO
We also found that so much about southeast asia put life (and perhaps our subsequent lives) into perspective. Next challenge, as you two have stated: incorporating those ideas, into your lifestyle once back home -where ever that ends up being. Good luck… and perhaps see you soon (south america?)…. we’ll keep tabs.
word.
Good insights to come to while still young! Hopefully one can realize that life is like backpacking… “make your experiences what ever you want and if someplace (or some job or whatever) gets played out move on… Many people live their entire lives never understanding the power and peace that being part of a community brings.
Love you Nathaniel and Kim.